May 04 2020

Horribly Helpful Ways to Keep Busy

#5 – Try judging a book by its cover, reading it, then changing your opinion about that book. 

Let’s just say you have Old Yeller laying around. At first glance, you tell your wife “eh, this book may be a bit much.” By the time you reach page 128, you’ll learn that it’s not a bit much, it’s actually just enough. A true “sweet spot”, you tell her. Now you know that Old Yeller is about the illustrated boy and dog on the front cover, and not about your dad shouting at children. 


#4 – Try walking a mile in someone’s shoes and then keep it a secret, cause that’s pretty gross. 

Are you and your roommates the same foot size? Oh, you’re not? Even better. Go for a speed-walk (minding the distancing rules, of course) and think about how they would think about things. It’s quite refreshing to learn how much they admire and value you as a roommate/human being. Always a good mental and physical exercise. 


#3 – Try growing bangs, deciding they’re not for you, cutting them off, and regretting it immediately. 

Make your bad haircut the biggest problem of your isolation. Note: For fast-growing hair, repeat as needed. 


#2 – Try turning the space heater all the way up, playing beach sounds on your speaker,  and laying on a towel while you stare at the ceiling light.

It’s just like a Jersey Shore vacation, only without the seagulls, sunburn, and fistfights. For a more authentic Atlantic City experience, paint your ceilings like the sky, chain-smoke cigarettes, and see what online gambling is all about.


#1 – Try letting your pet, pet you.

Ignore them for days. It’s a much-needed power shift in the household/office/gym/hangout spot. This one takes some time, as you’ll end up resetting your progress every eleven minutes. Note: This works much better with inanimate creatures like pets rocks and that sort of thing. 


#0 – Try enjoying more of [ 2 one 5 ]’s blogs (we know you loved this one) and check out our recent work. 


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